MTV Video Music Awards Wrap-Up

wow. its been a hot second since i've written a blog post and, i have to admit, i missed it it awful lot. i think i got a bit deterred by how difficult the blogging world is and how much time is put into networking. regardless, lets give it another go, shall we?  

i love recapping such memorable events as the MTV Video Music Awards. as a child, the awards always played the night before my first day of school. it was the final wrap-up to the summer. this year, the awards played a week earlier, on the 26th of August. i was driving back from a fabulous weekend spent with my best friend, and was unable to watch the show live. i really didn't care all that much, but i adore reading the tweets of some of the funniest people on Twitter during the live show. oh well, guess i can pretend i watched it live and rewind on my tweets at the same time.

here. i'll bullet point some of my memorable moments of the evening: 

Pre-Show: 

* Austin Mahone performed (what is this, another Justin Beiber? hmm where was Justin anyway?) also, take off the damn winter beanie, come on mann! fun facts: Austin wanted to win a Moon Man so he could "put it in his bathroom" and calls his fans "Mahomies." uh huh.

* 20 year-old Ariana Grande, former Nickelodeon star, belted out high notes in a ice skating-esque costume (awkward), but i loved the makeup.

* sweeeeet ombre hair, Jared Leto. but he actually seems to be aging quite well. wonder what his secret is?

* Harry Styles, WHY must you be chewing gum the entire night? according to many online sources, Harry is well known for his constant gum chewing everywhere he goes. 

* YouTube singing/rapping sensation Becky G. wore a beanie labeled, "Ain't No Wifey." lets hope you aren't darling, you are only 16. what's happening to this world?

* i was surprised to see MTV amping up camera time for two actors during the evening. Theo James and Shailene Woodley are starring in the movie, Divergent, which comes out March 2014. they both didn't leave a true impression on me, and, dare i say it, seemed almost as entertaining as watching paint dry. note the dramatic haircut Shailene has, due to her role as Hazel in John Green's adaptation of "The Fault in Our Stars." (this excites me a bit, as i adored this book). regardless, they are cute and would probably make an adorable couple (hint hint).

The Show:

* Gaga. i have gotten past the point in my thought process to mention how weird or strange Gaga's performances are, because i've come to truly appreciate her for her voice and who she is as a person. maybe she dresses funny or wears thongs on stage, but she CAN. she has a strong fan base, has produced amazing music, and has appreciated every single moment of it. sing on, you strange lovely creature.

* Harry Styles peeled and ate an orange during the show. 

* Selena Gomez does nothing for me, and i find her to be very unintelligent. but hey, are you ready, come it get it ahhhh ahhh?

* (insert comment about Miley Cyrus' twerking here)

* Iggy Azalea, i have to say, is unknown to me. although she claims to be Australian, why does her accent sound so... awful?

* Lil Kim's "return" was pointless... i saw her coochie and she looked like LaToya Jackson, after plastic surgery.

* not sure if you guys knew it, but the show was in Brooklyn this year. just throwing it out there, not sure if you heard it a million times.

* no, don't clap for Kanye West. don't do it.

* Will Smith's kids are either uninterested in the show, or just "too good" for everyone else, i'd assume.

sweet shades, kiddo

* Macklemore performed his powerful song "Same Love" accompanied by Mary Lewis. Macklemore (i.e. Ben Haggerty) gained popularity through a strong online presence, and, although he has made himself a household name, it wasn't always that way. in 2008, he was prescribed Codeine cough syrup, that eventually led to his abuse of the drug for 2 years.

* Daft Punk. what the... what?

* no way, Taylor Swift won Best Female Video? shocked. i feel like she probably shouldn't have made a jab at Harry Styles' though. meh.

One Direction's reaction to Taylor's jab at Harry

* Ed Sheeran is who?

* Justin Timberlake is a god damn genius. he received the Video Vanguard Award (am i that old that i remember them handing that award to Madonna and Michael Jackson?) and went on to perform a solid 15 minutes. what a stud.

* having looooved N'Sync as a teen, i was quite interested in seeing their performance, but it was short lived. oh well, in all honesty, it was Justin's celebratory performance.

* so Drake performed, and all i could remember is this dude in the audience "shootin' it up and down"...

* i am a fan of Bruno Mars (when he isn't in jail), but dang, look how short he is! he does put on a good performance though.

* Will Smith threw out a confused look during the evening, which, i imagine, is his wonderment in why he brought his kids with him.

* what a lovely surprise to see Joseph Gordon-Levitt present the final award of them all, the Video of the Year. we kinda all knew it would go to Justin Timberlake, right? he came to the awards with his parents in tow, and dedicated the video to his late grandfather and grandmother. aw. why is he so perfect? the only thing he could change is that darn shirt!

* Katy Perry ended the show performing near the Brooklyn Bridge. she IS a pretty girl, but i feel like she is ruining that. her grill, her theatrical leopard dress, and her strange performances just make me feel so indifferent to her.

you probably are wondering why i failed to mention a certain performance that seems to be ingrained in everyone's minds? i hate to mention it at all, and i honestly didn't even want to give her the pleasure of my time, but, Miley Cyrus is a true disgrace. i won't say that she's "disgusting," "gross," "ugly," "inappropriate," "sexual," etc. all i can say is that she should be ashamed of herself. that's all. now we can gracefully move on and forget she even performed. because that's exactly what she wants us all to talk about. ahem* amanda bynes *ahem.

but most importantly.... is anyone else wondering how MTV still has these VMA's, yet doesn't even play music anymore?

what part of the show did you find the most memorable? i'd have to say Justin Timberlake's 15 minute performance was pretty impressive. he didn't grind on teddy bears, wear a thong, make a jab at anyone in his speech, or cause any sort of drama whatsoever. because of that, he's my favorite part of this year's VMAs. see you next year!

* disclaimer: all pictures are taken by me, screen capped, other than the pre-show pictures, which can be credited to Just Jared.

where i've been...

hey _________, 

i'm not really one to broadcast my personal life on the internet and have been keeping aloof from the social media world as of late. when i notice my life is so strongly effected that every waking moment feels like torture, i felt i should share my feelings with someone, even if that is a blog post to no one specifically. if you know me personally, you would know that i still have continued to walk the halls of my work and chatted with people in an upbeat, humorous way. but burdening the world with my problems and drowning in them at work, where no one wants to hear or see it, is simply not an option for me. i'm a strong woman and i can stand on my own two feet and plaster a smile on my face. however, this is what has been going on... 

not only have i been struggling with my inner demons and personal family problems, but i have recently been diagnosed with Meniere's Disease. it's not deadly or anything, but it is chronic and they have yet to find a cure. to sum up the disease (i think this term disease is rather silly), it is an inner ear disturbance which causes a severe equilibrium imbalance, pressure and ringing in the ears, and eventual hearing loss. some may not realize the severity of the disorder, because it appears in varying degrees. some may have a mild annoyance and it may last for 20 minutes once every few years. in my case, i have dealt with months of severe and debilitating disequilibrium where i am either bedridden or confined to a chair. i have been developing the symptoms of Meniere's since 9th grade. back in high school, i dealt with a serious bout which lasted me 24/7 for several years. The real issue with this disease is not only the severity of the symptoms that personally affects me for months, and years, at a time, but i never really know when symptoms will appear or disappear.

my personal outlet has always been my writing (i rarely am able to fully explain myself and my feelings in any other way) and i find it much easier typing to a blank sheet of paper than anyone specifically. and even if i had someone specific i wanted to talk to about my life, i still would struggle with my words and feelings. 

so as of late, i've been feeling a bit weighed down and somber. not only am i suffering from this incurable, chronic "disease" which wrecks havoc on my physical health and social life, but my family has been going through some struggles. struggles i'd rather not divulge in a blog post, but its been a rough road. and over the years, i have developed patience, strength, and a strong sense of humor to allow myself to cope with the sour feelings that have overcome me. and when i know that i have broken down the years and years i have spent building this solid wall, that's when i know that something is wrong. my life has been swirling in circles, people have come into my life and captured my heart, only to realize how unworthy they find me. sometimes i wish people could put them self in my position and realize the sacrifices and effort i have put into every single thing that i do. that maybe i'm not the cutest girl, or the skinniest, or the best at everything, but that when you have my heart, you have all of me. 

have you ever felt that a complicated and uneasy life is just the card that you've been dealt and you can't seem to escape from it? 

i hope that soon, i will find the motivation to blog more. until that day, i will continue to put on the full-fledged smile and carry on my days as if nothing is wrong.

if you are interested in finding out more about Meniere's Disease, there are many websites to check out, but here is one: The American Academy of Otolaryngology

Make Up For Ever HD Foundation Review

hey guys! just a quick happy easter to everyone, hope its a great day for all :) 

although my skin is rather clear and smooth, i do have a bit of redness and unevenness to it, so i usually throw on some bb cream or a light coating of foundation to balance it out. a balanced face is the most important part (as far as i'm concerned) to your makeup routine! today i am reviewing Make Up For Ever's HD Foundation... a holy grail (HG) product for many, many bloggers and makeup artists. 

MUFE's website describes this foundation using a "new generation of makeup.. invisible to hd cameras and the naked eye.. the HD foundation is oil-free, medium to full coverage which covers skin imperfections, while remaining invisible on-screen and in real life. its extremely fine texture is supple and easy to apply. enriched with moisturizing agents, it leaves the skin soft and radiant." (Make Up For Ever)

it comes in many shades, 25 to be exact, and is best applied with a sponge or a brush with nylon bristles. here is what i thought of it...

this particular foundation had been on my wish list for a long time, and although i did not believe i needed a medium to full coverage foundation, i bit the bullet and splurged ($42) on it. sephora has it ranked at a 4.4 out of 5, which sold me! however, the reviews i read through were all over the place. one person says it's "too blotchy and thick" and another exclaims the "light coverage, you're better off buying a bb cream." hmmmm okay.

in order to make sure i get my money's worth, i decided to politely ask a Sephora consultant to color match me. after a few trial and errors (my skin tends to go a bit neutral), i was matched up to 115 Ivory. it is the second to lightest color they have and is "for light skin with pink undertones." ah, i'm so pale!

so below i have the three step process on the back of my hand: pump out a dollop, smooth a little, smooth out completely. it really is a great color match for my skin!

just a bit!

smoooooth it out a tad

invisible!

so of course i have used this foundation since i have purchased it back in january, and feel like i can give you a fair review on how i feel about it. the color is perfect for my skin and the consistency of the foundation is surprisingly lightweight. however, i did have trouble applying this to my face and making it look perfect. even after switching my moisturizer (oil-free foundation and heavy moisturizer does not work together), it just never really sunk into my skin. regardless of how well it smoothed out on the back of my hand, it just did not have the same effect for my entire face. some days i thought it looked nice, others i just couldn't put my finger on what was going on. even with primer, it just clung onto any little dry spots i had on my face. i found it didn't cover as well as it promised, but still looked heavy on the skin. 

Overall Review: i wanted so badly to like this foundation, as i'd shelled out the money and heard great reviews. i was happy with their shade selection and imagine anyone will be able to find their perfect match. the bottle was made of lightweight plastic and the pump was easy enough to use, so that was a plus. however, the formula did not work well with my skin, even after a change in moisturizers and primers, so i simply cannot say it made my skin look the greatest. i did hear this happen to others, so maybe it only works on certain types of skin. sigh. still on the lookout for my holy grail foundation!

Rating: C

happy easter!!

currently listening to...

the lumineers! ho hey! so i nabbed the lumineers self-titled cd from a very thoughtful friend and have really been loving it. i was just delighted to hear that the two founding members of the band began writing and performing in ramsey, new jersey, not too far from where i live. of course like any wanna-be successful band, they picked up and moved to new york city, found it to be too cut-throat, and moved to denver, colorado. this is when they met Neyla, the female cellist, after posting an ad in the paper.

so get this coolness: two entertainment managers from a record label saw a video the boys and gal posted on youtube of them performing "ho hey" from their apartment. a raw, dark, amateur video and that was that! signed. the rest is history. 

you can check out their original video of the song here: the lumineers - "ho hey" and after, watch the new official video and see how similar they are!

so here is my breakdown of the cd in its entirety:

* currently, it is not a cd that i will play throughout without skipping songs. there are a few that i have to be in the mood to listen to. 

* there are TWO songs that have a certain sound to them; a sound that reminds me so much of a very intimate moment. ya know, it seems like its meant to play during that time.

* one song reminds me so much of a song i've heard before, and i simply can't place it. a song from the 70's.

* i have two current favorites: "stubborn love" and "big parade"

the lumineers just released the new music video for "stubborn love" february 8 and it definitely pulls at your heart strings.... check it out!

i just adore this band and how they make me feel. indie/folk is right up my alley, as it just makes me feel so free and calm. if you love mumford, check these guys out. you won't be disappointed!! now, onto ticketmaster to check their tour dates! :)

MAC's Stereo Rose Mineralize Skinfinish Review & Swatch

hi lovies, today i am here to review another MAC product that i have been hoarding since January! it was another item that made my february favorites! as you can tell throughout my blog i have been a fan of MAC cosmetics for a while. unfortunately, their new collections haven't really done it for me, but i am still a fan of their classics and certain types of items. one of those is the mineralized skinfinishes. kinda a big fan. i have a ton of them that i have bought throughout the years. i can't resist how darn pretty they look. see for yourself!!...

back in 2010, Stereo Rose was re-released and sold out in minutes of going online! since its been 3 years, MAC decided to release it again with their Apres Chic Collection and made sure they had a good amount in stock. however, it has recently sold out again! this time, i was able to nab it for myself and man, i'm rather happy i did.  

at $29.00 a pop, it is rather expensive, but you do get 0.32 oz. and believe me, it lasts FOREVER! you don't tend to use a lot because its meant more for a highlight/blush, not for the entire face. since i am uber pale at the moment (i'm talking NW 15), i have been using this in place of blush. as it does lean more coral, i have to use a slightly lighter hand because i don't want to over do it. however, when spring and summer come, it will look a bit more natural on my tanner skin. 

veiled in golden shimmer and peachy pink, MAC's Stereo Rose is surely a unique find. every single one looks different! in fact, some people prefer to go in-store to pick their own mineralized skinfinishes due to how different every single one looks. i didn't, as i noticed most tend to blend out and look the same haha.

swatched on the back of my hand and finger, with flash

OVERALL: a total beauty, i'm glad i picked this up before it sold out. it is a bit too bright for my skin coloring right now, but i imagine i will be using it throughout the spring and summer once i get a bit tanner. although it is marketed as a blush and highlighter, i have been using it lightly in place of my blush. i love MAC's skinfinishes, but they do have downside: wear time. although great pigmentation (as show on my finger), it doesn't seem to last the longest on the skin. i imagine about 4 hours was its wear time. not too great. however, its smooth finish, beautiful color, and great pigment makes it still a great product! 

RATING: A

you know you are sick when...

i have come down with this nasty little bugger of an ear/throat infection thing and have been mostly bedridden since last friday, so i have tried to beat my cabin fever by lethargically tweeting oddities that have proven to me that i am indeed really sick. i've organized them here for you all to see. what else do i have better to do? probably sleep, which is all i've done :(

you know you are sick when...

* your ears are so sensitive to noise, that you have requested the family to turn down the television at least 5 decibels.

* when House Hunters International (a favorite) comes on tv, you shrug your shoulders, mutter "meh," and turn it off.

* your evening routine consists of popping two horse pills and a dose of nyquil before heading to bed at 10.

* you finally muster the courage to take a shower, and emerge entirely exhausted and out of breath.

* your toothpaste tastes a whole lot like black licorice. and that's just horrible.

* your cocoa butter chapstick has traded flavors with vanilla cake batter. & maybe you're delusional, but you don't quite mind the trade off.

* water tastes better than any other drink.

* changing your clothing takes 3 times longer than usual.

* you feel a chill, so you pop in the thermometer just in case you have a fever again.

* no matter if you slept all night and took long naps during the day, you are still so exhausted.

* you've become best friends with your cats and they are sleeping closer to you at night because they want you to feel better too. at least, that's what your sick, delusional mind thinks.

* do i have a show on tonight? i don't have a clue because i don't know the day or date. or even if it's still winter outside. 

* you want to read that book so badly, but holding the pages open to read is so freaking hard.

* forget about listening to music, that shit will burn a hole on your uber-sensitive ears.

* you draw yourself a nice warm bath, which hasn't occurred in a year, with stress relief bubbles and a candle in hopes it miraculously cures you.

* you miss the taste of food sooo much.

* chicken noodle soup has become breakfast, lunch, and dinner. well, actually, just lunch & dinner because you sleep through breakfast usually. and sometimes dinner.

* you are watching a tv show, but you aren't really watching it. you most likely are staring at moving images with the volume close to mute.

* your favorite pair of cozy, over-sized sweatpants have been glued to your hips since the very first signs of the black plague that has encompassed your life. in fact, they probably should be washed. 

* you never drink tea. but now you do.

* you've finally depleted the supply of christmas tissues in the house so mom can put out the 'spring' supply. which you will probably go through as well.

* you think you are feeling better, so you start to catch up on your favorite tv shows (i know, big steps), and you stop halfway because you have no idea what is going on.

* writing this entire post has worn you out and now you need a nap...

NARS Light Reflecting Pressed Setting Powder Review

another of my february favorites, i'm here to review the Nars Light Reflecting Setting Pressed Powder! this powder had sold out immediately online the day it was released, so i popped over to closest full Sephora store (a solid 45 minutes from here!) and nabbed one for myself. whew, the relief! here's my review...

it came in this cute little black pouch

this little gem released about 5 weeks ago and is a weightless, translucent pressed powder meant to reflect a flattering light on the skin, without a trace of color. because of the lack of color, i was not able to show you a swatch because you aren't meant to see anything but matte, smooth, flattering skin! 

according to the Sephora website:

In final clinical test results:
- 84% agree that the product was non-drying
- 72% agree that the product blurred enlarged pores
- 72% agree that the product blurred fine lines and wrinkles
- 94% agree the product smoothes out skin’s appearance
- 91% agree that the product absorbs excess oil
- 81% agree that the product sets the foundation
- 75% agree that the product helps the foundation and other makeup to stay put all day

clicked to make larger, you can see a tiny bit of shimmer, but it doesn't carry over to the skin

OVERALL: this powder is good. based off of reviews, it seems to be the holy grail product of the year so far, but i think that i need to really play around with it more and consider what it actually does for my skin. yes, it feels nice on the skin, i can't see it at all when i apply it (good thing!), and it holds my makeup nicely throughout the day. however, i haven't really noticed a difference between using this and using my conventional drugstore pressed powder. in fact, i sometimes throw this on top of my pressed powder because i don't think it quite works well enough alone. i use a dense, but larger, buffing brush with this, and i can't even tell if its on my brush or not. again, this is a good thing, but i kinda feel like maybe i might not be picking any up on it? you know how a blush can get a weird cast over it that you have to use your nail to slide across? it seems to do that, so i'm not too sure its on my brush. it did come with a thin white powder press, and i find it works a little better because i can apply it and see a bit of a white color before blending it out, knowing well it has actually transferred to my skin. overall, i would like to continue using it, as it is $34. a pop and has hope. 

RATING: B

hope i helped you in your consideration of this product :)